The famous baseball catcher, outfielder and manager, Yogi Berra was credited with saying “if you don’t know where you’re going, you will end up somewhere else.” Nowhere in life is that statement more true than with addiction.
No one starts out seeking to be an out-of-control addict. No one yearns to feel the shame and hopelessness that addiction brings. But no matter what your compulsion—if you pursue it long enough, it will always take you to the same dismal place: alone, scared, out of control, powerless and hating yourself.
Not there yet? What a blessing! But, be warned that continuing to flirt with compulsive sexual behaviors, whether it be fantasies, affairs, pornography, prostitutes, or something else, is playing with fire. It’s easy for it to get out of control. Even if you’re able to stop, slow down, or maintain the same level of acting out for a while, eventually your need and behaviors will escalate. Old behaviors will become less and less effective and new ideas, that may even repulse you now, will become less intimidating and more intriguing. That’s the way it works. Without even realizing it, or ever intending to go there, this thing that once seemed like a savior and a friend, will become a controlling master that robs you of your power to choose.
Melodramatic? Not to the hundreds of thousands of people who have unintentionally gotten caught in the grip of sexual addiction. They didn’t know where they were going . . . and they certainly didn’t realize how hard it would be to leave once they got there. Reach out for help now, before your sexual behaviors escalate and rob you of everything that is important to you.
“For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.”—Philippians 4:13
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