The Limbic System is the part of our brain that we call the “survival brain.” It is in charge of all our automatic responses . . . like breathing and blinking. It is also responsible for keeping us safe and is constantly looking for anything that it believes could be a danger to us either physically or emotionally. When it senses something that feels unsafe, whether it’s a big snarling dog or the threat of rejection, it initiates an automatic reaction to take us out of harm’s way. There are three main ways that we may respond:
FIGHT – (using anger to protect ourselves) A fight reaction may look like:
- explosive anger or actual fighting
- sarcasm, gossip or back-biting
- always needing to be “right”, arguing or blaming
- perfectionism or people-pleasing
Some of the more passive forms of fighting are often not recognized as such, but expressing anger behind someone’s back or trying to be so perfect that we are beyond reproach are equally effective ways of gaining control of a situation and/or keeping the perceived danger at arms length.
FLIGHT – (Using avoidance to protect ourselves) Fight may manifest itself in these ways:
- physically running away
- isolating
- getting caught up in mindless activities
- dangerous compulsions or addictions
- “acceptable” compulsions or addictions (workaholism) OCD, etc.)
Any of these behaviors will help us escape from what our brain tags as a dangerous situation.
FREEZE – (Shutting down or numbing out to protect ourselves) Freezing may look like:
- emotional numbing
- minimizing
- giving up, learned helplessness, or feeling like a victim
- not trying unless we are certain of success
- getting physically sick
- depression
All of these behaviors insulate us from having to feel and/or deal with the situation.
“Those who trust in themselves are fools, but those who walk in wisdom are kept safe.” —Proverbs 28:26 (NIV)
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