Bruce and I are going through a difficult season of “stuckness.” For several weeks, maybe even a month, it’s as if we’re slogging through molasses. Situations that should have been resolved weeks ago are still pending; tasks that we thought would be easy, are still awaiting completion for a variety of reasons; important correspondence has been lost in the mail; E-mails have catapulted off into cyberspace, never to be seen again; phone calls haven’t been returned; and we haven’t been able to find the time or money to take care of other things that have been staring us in the face. It seems like every way we turn, we’re waiting on something. It’s incredibly frustrating.
I’m a big fan of the to-do list. I love the awesome feeling of accomplishment that comes from checking off the done items. Except . . . everything’s stuck . . . there are no items to cross off. There is no feeling of accomplishment. I look at the same list day in, day out, powerless to get anything moving. It makes me feel anxious, hopeless and picked on. I know that, most likely, in a week or two, the mail will catch up, the projects will get done, and life will be flowing smoothly once again but, for now, all we can do is wait. It’s the pits!
I was praying and pondering our situation earlier this week, when God reminded me that a lot of you are struggling with feelings of hopelessness, as well. Hopelessness is very often the uninvited companion of any type of compulsive behavior. You may feel powerless and unequipped to make the necessary changes in your life. Spouses may wonder if things will ever get any better. Your feelings may be especially intense, because, unlike our situation, there often doesn’t seem like there is a light at the end of the dismally dark tunnel of addiction.
Michael Dye, the creator of the Genesis Process (the program we use as the foundation for our sexual addiction recovery groups) often talks about the cycle of hope. He says hope comes out of change and change only comes when we take the risk to do something different. Even the smallest risks can cause a measure of change and out of that change comes the hope that tomorrow will be different and better than today.
We lose hope when, out of fear, we avoid taking risks and let our lives get stagnant. There is an old saying that says “without hope the people perish.” There is truth in that. Without hope we become overwhelmed, despondent, even suicidal. Even when it doesn’t lead to physical death, hopelessness brings about a slow death of our soul—the snuffing out of the authentic person God created us to be.
We NEED change to move toward life and freedom. We NEED risk to bring about that change. What risks are YOU taking in your life today?
“I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people.” —Ephesians 1:18
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